Today we drop in on an interview with Cardinals catcher Yadier Molina which Fox Sports Midwest will probably never air.

Hi, everyone, B.J. Rains here with Fox Sports Midwest.

Today we're going to catch up with Cardinals catcher Yadier Molina.

Thanks for joining us, Yadi! This is the first time we've been able to talk since you signed your big contract.

How do you hope to spend all that money?

I've thought long and hard about this.

Mr. Shannon said I could raise thoroughbreds and try to win the Kentucky Derby!

Or I could buy my own private tropical island!

I could even start my own chain of pizza places!

But I'll probably just use it to pay people to kiss each other.

What?

Like, say, you and Jimmy "The Cat" Hayes.

What.

...

...

THE END.

For more Legopiece Theater: Dugout Abbey, enjoy this in-depth look at Chris Carpenter's visit with St. Louis Cardinals team doctors. Please note that all the people in these comics who appear to be Lego men are, in fact, Lego men.