Miami Marlins Home Run Feature: It Looks Even Bigger From The Field

As a St. Louis Cardinals fan I am at least ostensibly hoping that Kyle Lohse the Cardinals shut out the Miami Marlins Wednesday night, when they open the continental baseball season Wednesday night. Except—I finally saw a video of the Marlins' home run feature from the field, and it is the most ridiculous, beautiful, garish statue I have ever seen.

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In case you're wondering, this is what the death rattle of the obnoxious, seemingly indestructible retro stadium movement looks like. This, and the fishtanks behind home plate, and the white-and-glass billion-dollar-temporary-gazebo look of the whole thing.

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It's ridiculous, and it's in bad taste, but at least it doesn't look like some mall designer's idea of the 1930s. If it took a 60-foot-tall animatronic dolphin display to kill Camden Yards dead—well, it was worth it. I only wish it had happened in time to save the Cardinals from the intensely boring look of new Busch Stadium.

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Oh well—30 years from now they'll build a retro-cookie-cutter stadium for Busch IV, anyway.

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