God bless the Indianapolis Colts. In the grand scheme of terrible NFL teams the St. Louis Rams are dynastically bad—bad constantly, unsurprisingly, and ultimately unbearably—but the Indianapolis Colts are galactically bad, Tim Duncan-and-the-San-Antonio-Spurs draft nightmare bad. They're so bad without Peyton Manning that they might not successfully be bad enough to replace him—coming off a two-game run of Dan Orlovsky-mania, the Colts need only beat the Jacksonville Jaguars (and galactically bad quarterback Blaine Gabbert) while the Sam Bradford-less Rams fall to the 12-3 San Francisco 49ers to drop Andrew Luck-mania to the Rams, who would then, hopefully, trade him for a million useful players and a working offensive playbook, maybe the one from Horsefeathers.â†µ
This is what it's come down to, Rams fans: Unless you're looking for Steven Jackson to pad his 1000-yard season or for Kellen Clemens to establish himself as a worthwhile (and cheap) backup quarterback, all there's left to watch is whether the Rams are bad enough—and the Colts bad enough at being bad—to get, briefly, Andrew Luck. I'm sorry.