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Felipe Lopez and the St. Louis Cardinals: Separated At The Hip

This time seven months ago a much happier group of St. Louis Cardinals fans discussed the team's recent incredibly cheap acquisition of super super-utility player Felipe Lopez. Lopez was fantastic — he could stand at all four infield positions, he'd hit .298/.366/.409 over two seasons, including part of one in St. Louis, and once one just came to the conclusion that he dogged it as a Washington National it became incredibly clear that he was going to be just as good as he'd ever been for the Cardinals.

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Instead, he just became extremely representative of the Cardinals! In April and May he hit well but spent some time on the disabled list; in June he came back, ready to solidify an infield rocked by underperformance, and proceeded to underperform worse than anybody else. He cratered in August, hitting just .141, and then vanished in September, going 3-24. 

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This is like The Picture of Dorian Gray, only the painting and its subject get really old and terrible at the same time.