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Turf Show Times Breaks This Tony Softli Thing Wide Open

I'm not sure Ryan Van Bibber trusts me enough to take me down to see the full-wall map in his basement covered with pieces of thread and tacks marked "Confirmed Softli Sighting," but security clearance aside I've been impressed with his continued coverage, on Turf Show Times, of Tony Softli—area football gadfly, former Boeing systems analyst, and center of a burgeoning mustache-related conspiracy.

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How deep does this thing go? Marshall Faulk deep.