Per Joe Strauss of the Saint Louis Post-Dispatch, The Saint Louis Cardinals have traded Edwin Jackson, Octavio Dotel, and Marc Rzepczynski to the Toronto Blue Jays for center fielder Colby Rasmus.
↵How the trade negotiations went down:
↵Toronto Blue Jays General Manager Alex Anthopoulos: We'll trade you Edwin Jackson, Octavio Dotel, and Marc Rzepczynski for Colby Rasmus.
Saint Louis Cardinals General Manager John Mozeliak: Ooh, that's bad.
Anthopoulos: But it comes with a free frogurt!
Mozeliak: That's good.
Anthopoulos The frogurt is cursed.
Mozeliak: That's bad.
Anthopoulos But you get your choice of toppings.
Mozeliak: That's good!
Anthopoulos The toppings contain potassium benzoate.
[Mozeliak looks puzzled]
Anthopoulos ...That's bad.
Mozelaik: Can I go now?
↵
UPDATE: It got worse. Somehow. Per ESPN’s Buster Olney, the Cardinals will send Rasmus, Trever Miller, Brian Tallet, and P.J. Walters to the Blue Jays for Jackson, Rzepczynski, Dotel, and Corey Patterson. Yes, that Corey Patterson. The one with the .287 OBP.
↵If you need me, I'll be happily waiting out the necessary three day waiting period in front of the gun store.