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Cards Beat Marlins, Lance Berkman Hits 30,000th Double in Cardinals Franchise History

A bright night in Miami saw Continental USA Opening Night at Miami Stadium or whatever the hell they are calling it end with Kyle Lohse flirting with a no-hitter, Lance Berkman hitting (per Baseball-Reference) the 30,000th double in the history of the Saint Louis Cardinals franchise, and the Redbirds winning 4-1.

An artist's interpretation of the game: