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St. Louis Rams Turn Us Into Jennifer Aniston - When Will We Learn?

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The St. Louis Rams went up 17-3 Sunday against the Bucs and it felt like they had made some real progress. Once a Ram, always a Ram, though. The losing came naturally.

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Full disclosure: before the Sunday's game against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers I still hadn't fully bought into the St. Louis Rams.

I was rooting for the guys, sure. But not like I was back when games meant something. Those were the days when I was absolutely wrecked on Mondays because of what happened with the Rams. And perhaps the only thing that was good about having three complete pooch-screwing seasons was the fact that it didn't really matter what the Rams did on Sunday, because wins only screwed up draft position.

Not that I wanted it not to matter. It's just that three years of mind-numbing beatdowns has a way of getting your guard up. Didn't matter what happened in any of those six wins - more BS was waiting around the corner seven days later.

So when the St. Louis Rams had just taken a 17-3 lead over the Tampa Bay Bucs on Sunday, I finally gave in and Tweeted this:


I know.

I sound like Deanna Favre or Jennifer Aniston, right? I promised THIS time I was sticking to my guns and not putting my heart into this 2010 season until these guys proved to me they could win on the road.

And for the love of John Mayer I got suckered right back in time to get punched right in the gut. I was the scorned lover that wanted to believe that substantial changes has been made. And at the first sight of what I perceived to be the 'new' Rams—I called all my friends and told them.

18-17 Tampa Bay.

And now all my friends that were secretly calling me an idiot when I told them I went back to the Rams are laughing to themselves. Wondering if I'll ever learn.

And so it goes when you're creepily analogizing grown sweaty men hitting each other to the need for me to obtain a fulfilled heart. In the end, the Rams lost. I looked like a real sap. And the world reminded us that the Rams are historic losers not worthy of our trust until it's probably too late to not be called bandwagoneers.

Let's talk turkey here: the Rams should... SHOULD be 5-2 and heading into a home game against a 1 win team with visions of an NFC West division title in their sights. Instead, another monumental collapse of one particular area of the Rams has been exposed.

This time it's the offense's turn to take a bow.

Their woeful third quarter performance was vintage Rams football. Take everything that's working for you in a game and do the exact opposite. You know, because adjustments HAVE to be made. Adjustments WILL be made. (PS—if it's working in the first half, you don't really have to make changes just to justify your job. I swear.)

By the time the Bucs got the ball with four minutes to go, the Rams D was gassed from the unusually hot Florida heat and the late-game heroics of Josh Freemen were more a formality than anything.

I guess change takes time. That'll be the line out of Rams Park all week. Along with other gems like "we're making improvement" or "it's a culture change."

OK—you're right, Coach Spags. You can't learn what it takes to win on the road overnight. And the Rams did seem to have something figured out in the first half of the game. On the other hand, you have to realize that the threshold for us fans to truly, madly fall in love with this franchise is higher than the perceived level I publicly displayed on Twitter Sunday.

Deal? I mean, I was drunk and didn't actually erase your number like I said. Sue me.

Oh, and one last thing? It's always fun when the new boyfriend defends his love's incorrigible actions. I happened to have made a point that the Rams were pretty good at losing, so I guess we shouldn't be surprised when they let us down.

Then I get this:


Sometimes Jennifer Aniston just can't win.