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Lovie Smith, Chicago Bears Sign Two-Year Extension

Former St. Louis Rams defensive coordinator Lovie Smith—and by extension former Rams head coach and scapegoat Mike Martz—will get two more years to turn the Chicago Bears into the Greatest Show on Dirt, having signed a two-year contract extension a year after the Bears fell just short of a Super Bowl berth. Jay Cutler celebrated the news by visiting the angry mob massed outside his home and helping to burn his own effigy.

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The Bears' offense was significantly more boring than I'd hoped it would be in 2010, but two years is hopefully long enough for Smith and Martz to rebuild the team in their own image, and install a bone-crushing Magic Carpet astroturf surface over the grass at Soldier Field.

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I'm told that, as part of the deal, Trent Green has offered to sign a one-game contract to be the Bears' starting quarterback until he ruins his knee and Caleb Hanie has to come in and throw for 400 yards per game.